Wedding Day - Part 3 (from the Bride)

Driving off from the church, we wave to everybody, including the punters in the pub across the road. The bridesmaids are happily chatting away as Alan and I enjoy the moment. Halfway back to Fanhams Hall, we pull over to let the photographer shoot past us so he can get back before us.

There is champagne to greet us when we arrive, and some photos before we say goodbye to the car and the lovely driver - I have rarely met anyone better suited to their job, he was so calm and professional.

We locate the drinks reception and direct guests in the right direction. A short amount of time in which to catch up with guests and sample canapes before rounding up bridesmaids, ushers and family members for photos. We go off to have some couple shots round the grounds, and then just as it looks like rain, we head back to the shelter of the building for the wedding breakfast. Alan has fun trying to do up the fastenings on the back of my dress's train, as do a number of other people. It seems a lot more complicated than it looked in the shop...

There is momentary confusion when someone points out that a substantial number of our guests aren't yet seated. We are missing Alan's parents. Eventually we realise that noone has called in any guests from the library - they are retrieved by an usher and the problem is solved.

It is only now, when we are about to go in and give our speech, that I remember that I never had any lunch. It is now nearly 5pm. I am almost dizzy with hunger - but am quickly distracted by all the excitement going on around me.

Everyone gets to their feet as we enter, welcoming us as the Bride and Groom. It's a little overwhelming knowing that everyone is clapping and smiling because of us.

We're doing the speeches first, so Alan and I launch straight into our joint offering. It won't set the world alight, but we thank all the right people and it's a lovely feeling standing up next to my new husband and addressing our guests together - I highly recommend doing this.

Colin, Alan's brother and best man, gives a much better speech - nothing too embarrassing luckily - and then it's time for food. I feel full just looking at my main course but I'm damned if I'm not going to eat it as it's so delicious. Ditto dessert.

Between courses we have plenty of time to circulate the tables and say hello to everyone. We decided not to have a traditional top table, mainly because the numbers didn't really work. On our table we have our brothers and their partners, and my MOH and her partner. Our parents have their own tables with respective family members, with our parents being seated as close to us as possible. This seems to work as everyone can relax with people they know well already, and everyone seems happy.

It rains during the meal, proper summery downpours. We don't care. I don't think most people even really noticed. It's the only time it really rains all day. While I'm relieved, part of me is actually a little disappointed we didn't get to use the pretty blue heart-shaped umbrella we have.

Dessert is over and everyone trickles out of the room so it can be turned round for the evening party. The sun comes out, so we scoot outside to have some more photographs. Alan and I then sneak upstairs for a little while - simply to have some space to reflect on everything that's gone before. The day has run pretty much like clockwork, everyone has been fed and watered and we can relax - time for cake and party!

Groom, Best Man and Usher socks!

If they can have sock shots...

ALL PHOTOS COURTESY OF ROSS HOLKHAM PHOTOGRAPY

Thursday Cake Post

We've been writing a lot about our wedding recently, and there's a lot more to come. However, over the last few weeks it's been nice to start enjoying 'life' again (which we've carefully coordinated with the sun finally coming out and staying out for more than 5 minutes). At the moment 'life' means lots of birthday celebrations, which have been great for catching up with friends and family post-wedding.

Of course, birthdays mean cake, so in a break from wedding posts, here's some birthday cake. I made this for Alan's father, who celebrated a nicely significant birthday last week. 

Points to Note:

1. The recipe is from BBC Good Food. I doubled the ingredients and made two 10" cakes rather than three 8" cakes.
2. It came out a little dense, although very moist, so if I made this cake again I would try a different way of mixing to try and keep more air in there. I ended up with three layers as one of the cakes was a bit too thin to slice in half.
3. My cream cheese frosting seemed to taste overly cheesy, so I put much more icing sugar in and just made it to taste in the end.
4. Raspberries aren't in season yet so I used strawberries and left them in pieces rather than mashing them up. I sandwiched the third layer on with more jam and some of the cream cheese frosting (you would need to make more than the recipe gives for this to work). This gave quite a nice 'strawberries and cream' effect inside.

Just-about-finished product. Happy Birthday!

Wedding Day - Part 2 (from the Bride)

I enjoyed the drive to the church, although all I really remember is a few Saturday shoppers looking at us and smiling as we drive through Ware. Wow. I always like seeing cars of happy bridal parties driving along, and now that's me.

We're slowly approaching the church; although still too quickly,it seems, as we spot a number of guests still making their way down to the church. So much for being late - we're ten minutes early. I smile to myself, as I had told Alan there was no way I would be late.

It starts to drizzle lightly, but the driver literally has it covered, as he pulls a giant umbrella out of the boot. He also has water and mints - I could hug him, as my mouth has gone dry and my stomach is still a little nervous despite my overall excitement.

 

I climb out of the car - really not easy in a wedding dress - and we walk up the path. Astonishingly we are still early, and the vicar comes out to greet us. We can't start until the designated start time - it's a legal requirement. I see Alan inside (it is a small church) and wave like an idiot, forgetting that all our guests can probably see me. I don't regret it either way. The last couple of guests run up the path and past us.

Finally - FINALLY - it is time and we make our way towards the entrance. The organ starts - Pachelbel's Canon in D, one of my favourite pieces - and the vicar and rabbi start to process down the aisle. Phillipa and Juliet follow, and then Ellie and Annabel.

My parents start walking - I had asked both my mum and dad to accompany me down the aisle - and I am right behind them. As I step into the church, I see all eyes on me, but am only focusing on Alan, who I can see at the front. I think a few people take photos, although I couldn't have told you who.

We probably walked down the aisle too quickly, I reach Alan and stand there beaming at him for what seems like an age until the organ music stops and the service begins.

All too quickly - so quickly that I later flick back through the order of service to check we haven't missed something out - we reach the declarations and our vows. I listen to Alan's responses, loud, confident and firm, and I hope I echo that with mine. The rings are blessed, in English and Hebrew, kiddush wine is sipped and we finally get to wear our rings. We're married. We grin. We kiss. We grin some more. 'Smile' doesn't seem a strong enough word.

 

 I float through the rest of the service - the hymns, readings beautifully read by our mothers, the address, the Jewish blessings (more wine - oh yes). I enjoy the prayers, where Alan and I go up to the altar away from everyone else. 

 

Now comes the signing of the register - signature follows signature, mine first then Alan's,then my two brothers as witnesses. Lots of photos, and the marriage certificates are handed over. We're married and we have the paperwork to prove it. Hurrah!

 

We process out and wait for everyone else outside. On our spreadsheet, we timed this as 'scheduled mingling'. Everyone laughed, but that's what they're doing as "congratulations" is the word of the moment, hugs are swapped, and Ross is here, there and everywhere taking photos. I'm overwhelmed at how many of the local villagers, who we know from Sunday services, have turned out to see us get married. We didn't know they would come, and it means a lot to us.

Photo by Maxine von Eye

Confetti time - everyone forms a long tunnel and we walk through, the soft blue and cream petals falling around and over us. Later, I will find a lot of it down my dress. For the moment, it's all in my hair and veil - and yet I still can't stop smiling.

Eventually, we climb back into the car, bridesmaids in tow and off we go back to Fanhams Hall. Just got married!

PHOTOS BY ROSS HOLKHAM PHOTOGRAPHY (UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE)

Wedding Day - Part 1 (from the Groom)

I wake up at 6:15am. That wasn't in the plan ... breakfast doesn't start until 9am and I was hoping to avoid as much anxious pottering as possible.

I guessed this would happen and am actually surprised that I'd managed to sleep much at all. Usually before something big I'd have lain awake all night with my mind racing, but the night before had been so exhausting that I actually slept very well.

Frances is already awake and grinning at me like a Cheshire cat.

Rather than being stressful, this actually ends up being one of my favourite times of the day. It is too early for us to do anything, and there is gorgeous sunshine streaming in through the window; so we use the opportunity to make ourselves a cup of tea and sit eating Hobnobs in bed, waiting for the madness to begin. Two team-mates preparing for the big game.

The sun did come out - look!

Breakfast, when we do descend, smells wonderful. I am definitely in the category of people who, when presented with a buffet for breakfast, suddenly loses all sense of proportion and embarks on a multi-course feast that would shame a medieval banquet. But indulging can wait for tomorrow - the nerves are starting to kick in now. Especially as people start arriving I feel that I need to keep myself occupied with tasks.

Fanhams Hall have provided us with a room for me to get changed in, which is where I escape to - stopping only to quickly set up all of the candles and lanterns that we have brought that somewhere along the way had skipped my mind. We're far too organised otherwise, so I've really got a lot of time to kill - which I do by getting dressed early and then doing a crossword with Colin and my ushers that my parents thought to provide (excellent idea!). The first two answers I got were "fools rush in" and "runaway" ... I kid you not!

When we run out of things to distract me with, we head to the hotel reception to await the florist who arrives to deliver buttonhole flowers. As we get there the phone rings - it's the photographer. My heart sinks ... he should have been here half-an-hour ago. He must be calling me to say he is stuck in traffic - or maybe something bigger has gone wrong. Panic! "Hello?" "Hi, it's Ross here. We're taking some great shots of the bridesmaids up here. We were thinking of heading down and taking a few of the ushers - is now good?". Phew.

Groom, Best Man and two of the ushers

Groom and Best Man

The photographer brings tidings of a calm and happy room upstairs from the bridal suite; and the DJ wanders over from where he is unloading his van to wish me luck. It's time to head to the church already - where did the time go?! As we start to drive off I see the car that we have arranged to take Frances to the church turn up exactly on cue. The last piece of the puzzle has just fallen into place. For the first time since we started all of this I know that everything is going to work; so I sit back and enjoy the ride.

The Bride's chariot awaits

Wedding Day - Part 1 (from the Bride)

For me, our wedding day starts at 5.30am. I wake up, am instantly wide awake and although I'm tired, I know that I won't get back to sleep properly. Next to me, Alan is still fast asleep - I have to resist bouncing out of bed and running across the soft carpet of the bridal suite to check the weather.

I snooze,on and off, until 6.15am when, finally, Alan wakes up. I throw open the curtains to reveal a softly sunlit May morning. Even though it won't stay so sunny, that early-morning scene is imprinted on my memory.

We have tea and biscuits in bed, eager for the rest of the world to wake up. Finally, we can justify creeping downstairs to look at our reception room being set up. We run into my dad, habitually an early riser, and go off to enjoy a leisurely breakfast. Nerves begin to kick in as my bridesmaids appear for breakfast.

I take my leave and go off to make the bridal suite ready for the Charlie and Sarah, our makeup and hair artists. They arrive, as do my bridesmaids a moment later. The next couple of hours pass in a haze of blowdrying, waving, powder and mascara, and a lot of jokes and laughter. Three of my bridemaids are my cousins, so it's a good time to catch up properly on all the family news.

Ross and Lauren, our photographers, arrive and are as chilled as ever. They photograph my dress, shoes and flowers, as well as some shots of us having our makeup done. Then they go off to find Alan and his ushers, who apparently are already dressed and about to leave.

I feel calmer and yet more excited as it all starts to come together. The girls are dressed and look gorgeous; the car has arrived and I can, after what has seemed like both the longest and the shortest morning, start getting dressed. The photographers are back and are snapping away. We're ready to go.


Wait! I turn round and suddenly spy my veil lying on the back of a chair. We've all completely forgotten about it and I need the makeup artist to put it in for me; I have my dress on and the bridesmaid dresses are way too long to run with. We all look at each other - but by this time Lauren, Ross's assistant is already shooting out of the door in pursuit. What. A. Star.

She returns, Charlie in tow, and the veil crisis is averted. A few more photos, a quick debate on the merits of bag/ no bag/ wraps/ no wraps and we're really ready to go. Quick time-check as I think we're running late. It's 13h05. The ceremony is at 13h30. It takes 10-15 minutes to drive to the church, but we need to get downstairs, and the traffic could be bad. Are we early or late? I can no longer decide, so tell everyone firmly: "Let's go".

 

We meet my dad coming upstairs. My dad is not a 'conventional' father of the bride, and there's no way I would ever want him to be, but I don't think I've ever seen him look prouder (a theme which, judging by the photos, is set to continue for the rest of the day).

The driver is ready for us downstairs, and remarks how calm we all seem. I realise, with a jolt, that we seem calm because we are calm. I feel astonishingly laid-back. Let's go and get married.

ALL PHOTOS BY ROSS HOLKHAM PHOTOGRAPHY

What We Did At The Weekend: Our Wedding

Today we realised it's Friday. Which means that this time last week, we were at Fanhams Hall preparing to get married. People were beginning to arrive at the hotel; we started to run into some of our guests every time we left the room. It was exciting. We had managed to wangle the bridal suite for the Friday night as well, and were enjoying settling in to a rather luxurious room.

I was tired, nervous and my head was thumping. I hadn't slept well for the last few nights, and was worried about the meal we had organised for our parents, siblings and bridal party and partners. Would everyone find the place? Would people talk to each other? What if someone couldn't find anything they wanted to eat?

I ended up going to hang out in our room for a bit before we went to eat. I didn't sleep, but an hour of peace to finish a few last minute jobs and read my book was really valuable.

I needn't have worried about the meal, although my head didn't stop aching and my stomach was all nervous. In hindsight, I should have realised that everyone is adult enough to get themselves to a pub and have dinner! Everyone was talking and getting to know those they didn't know already; food and drink was had and enjoyed; I'm sure I even heard somebody laughing at some point ;-) We're very grateful to the Vine in Ware for hosting us (all 22 of us) - we know such a large party can't have been easy. They even helped us celebrate a rather important birthday:

Happy Birthday Euan! - photo by Maxine von Eye

Although Alan and I gave up and went up to our room for an early night and a final details check, it was so nice to hear that everyone else seemed to end up in the bar talking to each other until the small hours:

Photo by Maxine von Eye

Memories from the evening:

• Forgetting the cheese and Alan going back to get it;
• Our usher Euan, giving up his birthday to spend the evening with us;
• Honeycomb and mint ice cream - who knew?
• My father making it from the Alsace and finally meeting Alan's parents - the last details clicking into place;
• Our last night as an unmarried couple - nervous but calm.