One Year Ago

We did this

 

 

It's been a busy year - marriage, a new job for me, packing and moving house twice (and more house viewings than is good for anyone) and our latest adventure along the path to parenthood. But it's also been wonderful - full of happiness, laughter and planning for the future. So thank you Alan for a wonderful first year of married life - and here's to many many more.

Wedding Rings - Harriet Kelsall Jewellery Design

As we're coming up to our first wedding anniversary (What? A year already?! Afraid so...) we thought we would send our rings for an anniversary polish while we take a weekend away. Although it'll mean we don't have our rings for our anniversary, we do have cheap 'travel rings' for holidays so won't be completely ring-less.

I never did write a post about our rings so now seems to be a good time.

We knew we wanted our wedding rings to (a) reflect us and (b) be a little bit different, and we searched for a long time to find what we wanted. We thought a vine leaf engraving pattern with a stone in the middle would be interesting, and eventually we came up with a design on the back of the Evening Standard on the way home from work one evening (wedding planning tip - always keep pen and paper in your handbag!). We decided that as the main colour in our wedding would be blue, sapphires in our rings would reflect that.

Our first stop was the place we bought my engagement ring, as the lady who helped us design it was so lovely and helpful and we had loved the result.

A shame, then, that the experience this time round was so awful. The man we spoke to was of the 'yes this is what you want, most people have one like this' conveyor belt attitude and it made us feel unspecial and rushed. Alan had never worn a ring before and really wanted to try lots of different shapes and thicknesses, and this guy just wasn't interested. We had also decided we wanted some engraving, and were told that unless we had the exact specific design, they couldn't do it in case we didn't like it.

Well.

Some friends of ours recommended Harriet Kelsall Jewellery Design for personal designed jewellery so having spend hours browsing her website in excitement we decided to make an appointment. We chose the branch near Hertford - they also have a workshop up in Cambridge.

They were running really late, which wasn't a good start and made us nervous as they shut at 4pm on a Saturday. However, they did make us plenty of drinks and certainly didn't seem to be clockwatching as we were there far later than 4pm in the end.

We met Sarah, one of the designers and explained what we were looking for. She was fantastic and both Alan and I were able to ask plenty of questions and try on lots of different types of rings. She drew out our design in a much more technical fashion than my bit of newspaper for us to approve, did lots of different costings based on various factors such as metals, stones. We even got to look at and examine the different sapphires and choose which ones we wanted.

This was great fun until the tweezers went 'ping' as I was holding them. Cue five or six people in utter silence, on hands and knees looking for a tiny tiny blue sapphire on the floor. Luckily it was found - I've rarely been so embarrassed!

We left the workshop at well past 6pm and were really pleased that they'd stayed open for us. We were already looking forward to seeing our rings!

When we finally picked up our rings just before Christmas 2012, we were overjoyed. We were blown away that they'd managed to make our little design and associated ramblings into two beautiful rings, with no fuss and plenty of creativity. Amazing.

 

We've since been back to the workshop a couple of times for resizing and polishing and we've always been made to feel so welcome. I love visiting their workshop - some of the pieces on display are stunning. If you want a special piece of jewellery made, I would highly recommend Harriet Kelsall Jewellery.


Not sponsored in any way - we just love our wedding rings so much it was time we shared them with you.

Our Wedding: The Music

There was music playing throughout our wedding day. When deciding what to have we wanted to strike the right balance between tracks that meant a lot to us, and ones that would suit the general mood on the day.

We had opted to have music playing over the wedding breakfast, and saw this as a good opportunity to play some personal songs in the background - we like a lot of country rock and acoustic music, which wouldn't necessarily have been suitable for a dance party. We decided to give our DJ (Tim Franklin, Franklin Entertainment) more free reign when it came to the evening disco as we thought he would have more experience in keeping a party going.

Apart from the first and last dances our DJ was asked to play a mixture of songs, using his own experience but also taking requests where possible. He did an excellent job of judging the mood of the room, and managed to keep the dance floor packed from start to finish! He was so good that many of our guests thought that we had picked the songs specially ourselves.

We don't have a record of every song that was played, but in case you're interested these are the ones that we had specifically requested.

The First Dance
I Hope You Dance - Lee Ann Womack

The Last Dance
Sober - Little Big Town

(I had never heard of the concept of a last dance before. We told the DJ that if it didn't suit the mood at the time that he didn't have to play it, but he managed to work it in very well. The tracks leading up to it had started to bring everyone towards the dance floor, and the penultimate song "New York, New York" had everyone dancing with arms linked in a circle. Somehow we ended up in the middle of the room during that song, which meant that we were the centre of attention as the last song started. It's a love song, and it was lovely to end the night dancing together with couples dancing all around us. It was the perfect end to a perfect night of music.)

Wedding Breakfast Background

Paper Airplane - Alison Krauss
Lie Awake - Alison Krauss
A Simple Love - Alison Krauss
The Lucky One - Alison Krauss
Looking in the Eyes of Love - Alison Krauss
Dimming of the Day - Alison Krauss
It Doesn't Matter - Alison Krauss
Lord Don't Forsake Me - Alison Krauss
Sleep On - Alison Krauss
I Will - Alison Krauss
It Wouldn't Have Made Any Difference - Alison Krauss
When You Say Nothing At All - Alison Krauss
Need You Now - Lady Antebellum
American Honey - Lady Antebellum
Just A Kiss - Lady Antebellum
I Got You - Jodie Marie
Ventura Highway - America
Coat of Many Colours - Dolly Parton
From Here to the Moon and Back - Dolly Parton
Roots - Show of Hands
Would You Go With Me - Josh Turner
Only You - Joshua Radin
Closer - Joshua Radin
I'd Rather Be With You - Joshua Radin
How to Save a Life - The Fray
London - Sandy Denny
Easy Silence - Dixie Chicks
Tornado - Little Big Town
Your Side of the Bed - Little Big Town
Can't Go Back - Little Big Town
Stay - Little Big Town
Self Made - Little Big Town
Boulder to Birmingham - Emmylou Harris
Deeper Well - Emmylou Harris
All My Tears (Be Washed Away) - Emmylou Harris
Wild at Heart - Gloriana
When the Morning Comes - Jon Allen
I'm Gonna Love You Through It - Martina McBride
Dancing Every Night - Paper Aeroplanes
Newport Beach - Paper Aeroplanes
Sing It - Paper Aeroplanes
Hey There Delilah - Plain White Ts
1,2,3,4 - Plain White Ts
Rhythm of Love - Plain White Ts
Write You a Song - Plain White Ts
The Scent of Love - Michael Nyman
The Heart Asks Pleasure First - Michael Nyman
Postcard from Paris - The Band Perry
Walk Me Down the Middle - The Band Perry
Perfect Day - Miriam Stockley
Adiemus - Miriam Stockley

We hope that you enjoyed the music on the day, and thank you all for dancing all night long!

Alan

Our Wedding - Part 4 (From the Bride and Groom)

Time to cut the cake. The DJ introduces us for the second time and we head to the cake table, now positioned in the centre of the room.

We cut the cake to a chorus of camera flashes, standing there for an eternity to make sure everyone gets the shots they want. We don't really know how long we're supposed to pose for. I nibble some of the cake from the knife - yum. We stand there for a bit longer until the flashes seem to have died down fully, and then the cake is whipped away to be sliced up for later.

Just the first dance to go, and then it's party time. Our choice is Leann Womack, 'I Hope You Dance'. I hadn't really been looking forward to this before today but I've had such a fantastic day and am so relaxed that dancing to one of our favourite songs is just the icing on the cake. The music starts and it's just Alan and me, just twirling gently round the dancefloor in our own little world, singing along to the lyrics. About halfway through, I nod to the DJ and he invites everyone else to join in, which they do.

 After a moment's pause at the end, the DJ launches into Scissor Sisters' 'I Don't Feel Like Dancing' (I've no idea if that was a careful choice based on our dance or whether it's just a good first tune for parties; either way, a great choice!) - the dance floor stays packed and the evening starts.

Around 10.30, the side room is open and the spread of evening food is revealed. We've gone for sausage, bacon and egg rolls, and fish and chips - there is also cheese (with crackers and chutney) and cake to sample. "It's breakfast!" one guest says to me delightedly. The dancefloor is abandoned and a huge queue forms. We hadn't thought people would be that hungry at that time so we're glad we listened to the venue on catering numbers, as boy, would we have been in trouble otherwise. My brother is slightly aggrieved that he misses out on the bacon - even though I point out that he already has one of everything else!

I grab a slice of cake as I can't summon up the appetite for anything more substantial. I'm a little sad about this as everyone keeps telling me how tasty the buffet is, but the cake is definitely very good.

Once the buffet has been torn apart, it's time to get back on the dance floor for the last hour or so. A combination of great requests from our guests and excellent work from the DJ keep the dancing going, with some cheesy country music favourites. At one point Alan and I are twirling round the room (it turns out my dress is perfect for twirling - I never thought to test it out for such qualities in the shop!); I become aware that everyone else has stopped and is clapping as we dance in the middle. It's like magic happens and we know the evening has been as much of a success as the rest of the day has been. It's an amazing moment.

 Eventually, the party begins to wind down a little as we begin to say goodbye to some of our guests who have to leave. The dancefloor is full for 'New York, New York'. Somehow Alan and I end up in the centre of the circle, which is perfect for the last song.

We picked a 'last song' but didn't know whether the DJ was going to play it. We knew it wouldn't be that well-known and we trusted him to know whether he thought it would work or not as we don't want the dancefloor to clear for the last song!

To our delight, the DJ announces the song we chose - 'Sober' by Little Big Town. To us, this song is the perfect, hazy, lazy tune for the end of a perfect day. Far from deserting us, the dancefloor is full with plenty of other couples and groups around us; as I glance around I am overwhelmed with the love radiating from everywhere. Alan and I sway together in each other's arms - I'm not sure I can call it dancing as we're so busy singing and smiling at each other - until the music finally fades away.

The lights go up and the music is over. I am still wearing my shoes where others have long-ago abandoned theirs, but even my feet are starting to ache now.  Many guests head to the bar to continue the party. In some ways I am reluctant to bid everyone good night, but we are both shattered so we leave everyone to it and head* upstairs. With hindsight, I wish we had stayed up with our guests a bit longer, but realistically I probably would have been falling asleep in a corner before too long.

Upstairs, the pixies have been visiting, and magically some cake, a bottle of champagne and a basket full of cards and gifts from our incredibly generous guests have appeared. Different, bridesmaid-shaped, pixies have visited and spread confetti, petals and balloons over the bed. A wonderful, magical, scene and it feels like a tiny, one-room world which is ours only.

Still reluctant to say the night is over, we potter round the room, bathing in 'newlywedness' and, less romantically, trying to get the feeling back into our numb feet (Toes? What toes?). Eventually, we can't avoid the need to admit defeat and get some sleep, as we have a long drive tomorrow. Our wedding day might be over, but our marriage is only just beginning.

*By 'head', I mean 'hobble' - my feet are suddenly no longer really working.

PHOTOS BY ROSS HOLKHAM PHOTOGRAPHY/ ALAN'S PARENTS

Wedding Day - Part 2 (from the Groom)

"Right, so, where are we going?"

This is what Colin, who is driving me to the church, asks as we pull out of the car
park.

"I thought you knew?!"

OK, so not quite planned to perfection then.

I've driven to the church a number of times, but not from here. I quickly debate setting up the sat nav, but would rather not have us stop now that we have momentum.

There are four of us in the car, all dressed up in our finest tail-coats and sporting flowers in our lapels. We don't get as many looks as I imagine the main wedding car will have, but I revel in the double-takes we get as we crawl slowly through Ware town centre.

The church is only a 10 minute drive away, so we are there in a flash.

Guess this is the right place then!
(Photo courtesy of Maxine von Eye)

We're just over an hour from the ceremony time, but people start arriving right away. A worry of mine was how easy it would be for people to park, and there are more cars already parked in front of the church than I had expected, but the ushers do their job of shepherding people to the overflow and everything seems to work out.

Inside the church I say hi to the vicar, and run through some last minute details with the rabbi who had been unable to make it to the rehearsal. There are also a number of the regular church congregation there who all wish me luck.

Outside everyone is enjoying a brief moment of sunshine. There is a pub directly opposite the church, and I am pleased to see that most people are taking advantage. My parents arrive and offer moral support, but I'm quite calm.

Much mingling was done.

Groom and Mother
(Photo courtesy of Maxine von Eye)

Family Godfrey

It gets to 1 o'clock quickly and when a critical mass of people seem to have arrived, I make my
way inside and head to the front.

I remember turning around at some point and seeing that Frances's car has arrived. It's 1:20pm - 10 minutes early! Excellent.

It takes them a while to get to the entrance, but when they do all I can see is Frances, sun-lit and radiant in white, beaming at all around her. She sees me and gives me a wave full of excitement and joy.

The vicar takes the opportunity to read out some notices, and to give everyone an idea of what is going to happen next, and the rabbi gives a brief introduction as to why he is there and what he'll be doing. I can't recall exactly, but one of them makes a comment in reference to me, and I pull a face and shake my head. This gets a small laugh from the room and instantly I relax.

Groom and Best Man - looking relaxed!

Until this moment I'd been tense and staring at the floor, unable to make eye-contact with the room full of family and friends; but now I'm more comfortable and I can lift my head and take it all in.

The vicar and rabbi go to speak with Frances, and before I know it they are racing up the aisle towards me. I knew Frances wasn't planning on going for a slow procession, but with it being a small church and everyone slightly nervous they end up moving at quite a pace.

I watch Frances from the first moment to the last and she doesn't take her eyes off of me either; until we are stood side by side grinning like idiots and the service begins.

The Bride!
(Photo courtesy of Maxine von Eye)

The hard-working gang who made sure everything
made it back to us after the ceremony. Thanks all!!
(Photo courtesy of Maxine von Eye)

My Second Favourite Wedding Photo

Today, Alan and I are on Any Other Woman as I sent in one of our beautiful photos for the lovely Any Other Photo feature, so why not hop over there now and take a look? It's a photo that really does mean a lot to me.

It was so difficult to choose my photo, I ended up sending in two, which is really strictly against the rules. I thought I would post the second one here so you can why it was so hard to choose between so many special moments in our wedding day.

This photo was taken right after our vicar had declared that Alan and I were officially husband and wife; right after we’d had our first kiss(es). Who knew where the day would go after this moment? Right then, we didn’t need to know. This is that moment when we were so incredibly happy, so caught in the moment that all we could do was hold onto each other, be as close as possible, and grin like idiots at each other at the fact that we’d done it, we’d got married and it already felt amazing.

Although there’s several photos showing moments I will always cherish, what I love about this photo is not just how happy and wrapped up in our new marriage we both are. It’s also about the huge beam across my mother’s face, and how proud the vicar and the rabbi both look, as if they are all stakeholders in this moment of joy, which I suppose, in many ways, they are. Although my father isn’t in this photo, he is standing just to the left of my mother and I know from other photos that he was grinning as well. It makes me realise that our marriage isn’t just about us. Everyone else really does care too.

 

PHOTO BY ROSS HOLKHAM PHOTOGRAPHY

Wedding Day - Part 2 (from the Bride)

I enjoyed the drive to the church, although all I really remember is a few Saturday shoppers looking at us and smiling as we drive through Ware. Wow. I always like seeing cars of happy bridal parties driving along, and now that's me.

We're slowly approaching the church; although still too quickly,it seems, as we spot a number of guests still making their way down to the church. So much for being late - we're ten minutes early. I smile to myself, as I had told Alan there was no way I would be late.

It starts to drizzle lightly, but the driver literally has it covered, as he pulls a giant umbrella out of the boot. He also has water and mints - I could hug him, as my mouth has gone dry and my stomach is still a little nervous despite my overall excitement.

 

I climb out of the car - really not easy in a wedding dress - and we walk up the path. Astonishingly we are still early, and the vicar comes out to greet us. We can't start until the designated start time - it's a legal requirement. I see Alan inside (it is a small church) and wave like an idiot, forgetting that all our guests can probably see me. I don't regret it either way. The last couple of guests run up the path and past us.

Finally - FINALLY - it is time and we make our way towards the entrance. The organ starts - Pachelbel's Canon in D, one of my favourite pieces - and the vicar and rabbi start to process down the aisle. Phillipa and Juliet follow, and then Ellie and Annabel.

My parents start walking - I had asked both my mum and dad to accompany me down the aisle - and I am right behind them. As I step into the church, I see all eyes on me, but am only focusing on Alan, who I can see at the front. I think a few people take photos, although I couldn't have told you who.

We probably walked down the aisle too quickly, I reach Alan and stand there beaming at him for what seems like an age until the organ music stops and the service begins.

All too quickly - so quickly that I later flick back through the order of service to check we haven't missed something out - we reach the declarations and our vows. I listen to Alan's responses, loud, confident and firm, and I hope I echo that with mine. The rings are blessed, in English and Hebrew, kiddush wine is sipped and we finally get to wear our rings. We're married. We grin. We kiss. We grin some more. 'Smile' doesn't seem a strong enough word.

 

 I float through the rest of the service - the hymns, readings beautifully read by our mothers, the address, the Jewish blessings (more wine - oh yes). I enjoy the prayers, where Alan and I go up to the altar away from everyone else. 

 

Now comes the signing of the register - signature follows signature, mine first then Alan's,then my two brothers as witnesses. Lots of photos, and the marriage certificates are handed over. We're married and we have the paperwork to prove it. Hurrah!

 

We process out and wait for everyone else outside. On our spreadsheet, we timed this as 'scheduled mingling'. Everyone laughed, but that's what they're doing as "congratulations" is the word of the moment, hugs are swapped, and Ross is here, there and everywhere taking photos. I'm overwhelmed at how many of the local villagers, who we know from Sunday services, have turned out to see us get married. We didn't know they would come, and it means a lot to us.

Photo by Maxine von Eye

Confetti time - everyone forms a long tunnel and we walk through, the soft blue and cream petals falling around and over us. Later, I will find a lot of it down my dress. For the moment, it's all in my hair and veil - and yet I still can't stop smiling.

Eventually, we climb back into the car, bridesmaids in tow and off we go back to Fanhams Hall. Just got married!

PHOTOS BY ROSS HOLKHAM PHOTOGRAPHY (UNLESS STATED OTHERWISE)